This blog was started years ago, and I took my writings from this blog to my personal journals. Through the years there have been journals filled with life experiences from my personal journey as well as our family's journey. I felt a strong pull to get back to blogging and creating a space to share all the experiences, lessons and tender mercies God has provided. It is with His guidance I write and pray to know what message to share. There are still personal lessons I need to learn through this process, and  I hope to bring inspiration to those reading as I share. We are not to walk this life alone, rather to support, love and find joy together in this crazy beautiful life!

Word for 2015-

   January 2015: my word choice was "Happiness." I read books, researched, wrote...all in my search for happiness (wait...isn't that a book/movie?) Anyway. As I focused on this word and looked for "happiness," I caught myself  thinking "if only." Seriously? I quickly discovered this "happiness" can't be found in my circumstances and especially through others. Not even with a new job, a boyfriend, children or friendships. Don't get me wrong there were many moments of pure bliss and happiness (how could one not be happy in Hawaii?); yet these moments were fleeting and became beautiful memories. Reality, setbacks and grief swooped in and knocked me on my butt. 

 "We choose to be happy and positive regardless of what comes our way." Pres Monson 

   So happiness can be found through personal effort, diligence, a positive mindset and having faith in something greater than ourselves/circumstances...still working on it! 2015 also brought more lessons to learn in this regard: Letting Go~(ya start singing...Let it Go...) Many opportunities for me to learn to let go and trust God and His plan. Sometimes you just have to give it to God and go to sleep.

   As I pondered what my word would be for 2016; I went through all I've had to let go of this year, and the list is long and got kinda depressing! In my efforts to stay happy and positive, the thought came...what's opposite of letting go? EMBRACE~  

Word for 2016- "Embrace~"

Embrace: an act of accepting or supporting something willingly or enthusiastically

 
   This really was a spiritual moment~choosing to embrace life and the changes that always come. It can be a very empowering process in discovering a direction you can take in the coming year. Something to work towards in our journey of growth. 

A Season of Change:

I LOVE TREES- you will read many a post connecting with trees. Does it matter the meaning of my name is Palmtree? That's for another post...moving on...

In this season of letting go and discovering happiness, I went for a run on my favorite trail. It was a beautiful fall afternoon and the leaves were breathtaking and you could hear the sound of the leaves crunching under my feet. In my urgency to get home something stopped me in my tracks and I realized; I am always rushing to get somewhere (maybe the life of a mom..single mom at that), but always in a hurry. Rushing to be home or to be with my kids (who are teenagers/young adults, do they really care-NO). Rushing to a job to show I'm a good employee. Rushing/dropping things to be with friends and loved ones. So I gave myself permission to slow down, step back and ponder this moment I felt God was trying to give me. I found this newly planted tree with its changing colors.

The irony of the changing seasons and colors of the leaves struck me and the emotions followed. I snuck into a secluded spot to have a good cry. See, just a few days before I was informed my son, who had already left to live with his dad a year prior, had decided now to move with them to California, and my second daughter would be going with them too. There have been so many changes in our family. Experiencing yet more changes (like the changing of the seasons) I see how it relates to my life, all of our lives. Seasons come, changes are a given, and yet in this moment I was having a hard time accepting the changes (really? like hanging on will stop the leaves from falling or stop the changes that are coming?) The serenity prayer came to mind, as it does many times..

"God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change. 

Courage to change the things I can.

 And wisdom to know the difference.

Living one day at a time, enjoying one moment at a time.

 Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace.

 Taking as He did, this sinful world as it is, not as I would have it.

 Trusting that He will make all things right if I surrender to His will. 

So that I may be reasonably happy in this life and 

supremely happy with Him forever and ever in the next. Amen."

As I was having these thoughts a single leaf fell right in front of me, landing on my foot. To me this was a tender mercy from a loving God to remind me He was there, and mindful of the changes. My thoughts quickly went to the healing which comes through Christ's Atonement and reminded "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." Philippians 4:13. We all can find strength and healing through Christ. It's all going to be okay. My dad jokes with me..."You're just going through the empty nesting phase that every parent goes through. You've just had to do it a lot sooner than most." So I willingly embrace the changes, and enthusiastically look for ways to create  meaningful time with my children. May we all find quiet, purposeful time to find the messages the Lord wants us to hear for this coming year.

"Grace will take us places hustling can't." Liz Gilbert

Bring on 2016: I Embrace...

Change, Grief, Faith, Love, Healing, Grace, Wellness, Discipline, Trust, Connections, Happiness, Solutions...